When People Drift Apart: A Little Star Still Shines Brightly


“At first, it’s obvious. In the end, it becomes ambiguous.”

Why do my relationships first come to mind when I read this quote? Then again, I don’t think I’m the only one who has ever experienced drifting relationships or ghosting. In fact, I never really understood what makes a person just ghost others. 

Some time ago, I used to talk to this guy, and we got along well. We had many common interests and fun conversations with each other. However, the exchanges in messages became shorter while the calls just stopped. At first, I thought that maybe it was because of work and schedules. After all, work is never easy. You also never know when you’ll suddenly get busy. However, as each day passed, I couldn’t help but feel worried and anxious about the lack of messages. In the end, I realized that I was ghosted. It felt awful, and I kept questioning whether I said something wrong. I also kept looking back at old messages for some kind of sign or indication of when the relationship started to fade. Now, I don't really think about this moment too much. But I’m sure that you've been in a similar situation before, right?

Just like what So Yun mentions in A Little Star Still Shines Brightly, relationships usually start out with obvious attractions and connections, yet sometimes, people slowly drift apart and end these bonds in a vague manner. Add to the fact that technology and social media have made this 10x easier and BAM! Ghosting becomes a normal thing.

What So Yun and I are trying to convey is that you aren’t alone in this kind of experience. Everyone experiences ghosting or relationships ending as an ambiguous mess. In reality, there isn’t much we can do about it. The best we can do is move forward and focus on making room for the relationships that do matter. 

It’s probably going to be difficult the first few times. But with the advice from So Yun’s A Little Star Still Shines Brightly and the strong relationships you currently have, you’ll be okay.